garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize