If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize
