Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Randomize
