let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Randomize
