marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Randomize
