Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
