I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize