I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
