You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize