Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
