So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
are you so shy because you have an std?
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
