Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
