Christians are straight up FREAKS
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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