so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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