I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Houston, we have a squirter
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
