she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
Randomize
