i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
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