We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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