I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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