worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
