I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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