used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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