When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
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