I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
this will be a night to untag.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
