3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Randomize
