His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
i barfeds in our rink
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize