Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
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