I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
Randomize