is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
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