I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Randomize
