shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
