hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
