I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
