he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize
