i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
You are in my phone as "Thigh Gap" and you apparently work for "DO NOT DRUNK TEXT, INC." That is why I called you six times last night. So unless you take a second job at "NO DRUNK DIALING LLC" expect more. PS I am sober so this is legit.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Randomize
