i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
Randomize
