i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize