Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Randomize
