I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
not ubering you a puppy
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
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