you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
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