Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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