OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
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