you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
