Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
