How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
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