Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Randomize
