oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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