This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
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