Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
Randomize
