Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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