Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
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